Diana Belden grabbed the multitude of shopping bags from the back seat of her car, and staggered to the front door, where she had to set the bags down on the small porch in order to fish her house key from her purse. The quest satisfactorily concluded, she unlocked the front door and gathered her bags up before walking inside.

Her husband Mart was in the kitchen, cooking up a new meatloaf recipe. He’d recently become enamored of several YouTube cooking channels, and tried to make a new recipe every night. As he came out to greet her at the door, he wore a voluminous apron and had smudges of flour powdering his nose and cheeks. “Di, darling! How was your shopping trip?”

“It was good, sweetie! You see all those shopping bags?”

Mart glanced at the sofa, which was overflowing with shopping bags. His face paled. “That’s nice,” he said weakly.

“I found a new swimsuit! It’s purple and will be perfect for our cruise next month.” Diana reached into the largest bag and pulled out a purple velour one-piece that was slit halfway to the waist—but the fabric was held together with three gold clasps. She waved it in front of his face.

“I’m sure it’s beautiful on you, cupcake,” Mart said. After all, how could it not be? Diana was a beautiful woman and her figure was perfect, at least to him. “But it doesn’t seem very practical for swimming.”

Diana nodded. “I agree,” she said. “That’s why I got it for lying in the sun, and another one for going into the water. Wasn’t that practical?”

“Um... yes, sure.” Mart reached up to scratch his nose, and felt the flour decorating it. “I’d better get back to that gravy, or it’ll scorch.” He turned and hurried back to the kitchen.

“I’ll try the suit on so you can see what it looks like,” Diana promised. She took the velour suit and started back to the bedroom.

Five minutes later, she appeared in the kitchen. Mart stood over a skillet of gravy, sweat beading on his forehead. His meatloaf rested on a platter next to the stove, and a bowl of mashed potatoes sat next to it. He stirred the gravy, staring at his phone’s screen as he did so.

“Look, Mart! What do you think?” Diana stood at the kitchen door. She wore the purple velour suit, along with a dainty pair of gold metallic kitten-heeled flip-flops, and a big smile as she struck a titillating pose.

“I think it’s getting pretty hot in here.” Mart grinned. He certainly did appreciate the view, although he’d been anxious for Diana to arrive home and help him cook supper. “Why don’t you slip into a robe so we can eat, and then you can model for me some more?”

Diana sashayed over to kiss her husband. “Okay, sweetie,” she said. “We can have fun later.”

Mart’s face was already flushed and his color deepened, while additional beads of sweat popped out on his forehead as he turned back to his dinner. He poured the gravy into a bowl, pulled a bowl of peas from the microwave, and moved all of the food to the kitchen table, which he’d already set. When Diana appeared again, this time wrapped in a modest summer-weight robe, the meal was ready.

“Mart, you are so talented,” Diana praised him as she speared her last bite of meatloaf. “Since you’ve slaved over the stove most of the afternoon, I’ll clean up the kitchen and you can take a shower. Then I’ll show you some things I bought for you today.” She gave him a suggestive wink.

Just thirty minutes later, the kitchen sparkled with cleanliness and the dishwasher hummed quietly. Diana gave the counter a final flick and hung the dishcloth over the kitchen faucet before heading back to the master bathroom.

Mart stood in front of the mirror wearing only a skimpy black Speedo brief. Diana tossed her robe aside and walked up behind him. “Are you busy tonight, you handsome man?” She ran her hands up and down his chest from behind.

“Well... my wife is expected home any minute,” he replied with a wink and a grin. “So... if you want to do anything, now is the time.”

As she took his face in her hands and began to drop kisses over it, Mart’s phone began to ring. “Let it go to voicemail,” she told him as he peeled the straps of her suit from her shoulders. “If it’s important, they’ll leave a message.”

Mart nodded. “Yes, they will,” he agreed, his voice thick.

Diana helped him by stepping out of the purple velour suit, allowing it to puddle around her ankles, while pulling down on the Speedo at the same time.

It was much later when Mart checked his phone. Diana’s soft, even breathing signaled that she was sleeping.

“Mart, where are you?” The voicemail message was from his sister Trixie. “You and Di were supposed to play Monopoly with us tonight.” Mart sighed. I forgot all about game night. Once I saw Diana in that suit, everything else went right out of my mind. He checked the time. Too late to call now. I’ll have to come up with some excuse tomorrow.

Saturday morning dawned sunny and warm—already 80F at seven in the morning. After breakfast Mart called his sister to apologize.

“Where were you last night, Mart?” Trixie sounded annoyed. “We had planned this game night for a month. Brian, Honey, and Dan and his new girlfriend, all showed up. But you and Di were nowhere, and you didn’t answer your phone. Di’s phone went straight to voicemail; it didn’t even ring.”

“I’m so sorry, Trix. I know, we’d planned game night last month, and I’m sorry we missed it. I was trying a new recipe and well, it got complicated and we didn’t notice the time.” He blushed as hard as he had last night, recalling exactly why and how they had lost track of the time. There was no way he was telling his sister the entire sequence of events from the night before.

After all, there were some things a man had to keep to himself.